Learning to be Lonely
by McRaider
Summary: "My father's happiest day was when he shipped me off to boarding school." Tony looked up at the dormitory; he wanted to be excited about this after all he was going to be away from Howard. On the other hand, he would be the youngest in the school and he'd be rooming with some kid named Loki…who the hell named their son Loki.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Learning to be Lonely  
Series: Seasons of Love  
McRaider  
Summary: "My father's happiest day was when he shipped me off to boarding school." Tony looked up at the dormitory; he wanted to be excited about this after all he was going to be away from Howard. On the other hand, he would be the youngest in the school and he'd be rooming with some kid named Loki…who the hell named their son Loki.  
Author's Note: My wife requested I write this story series ages ago, so I figured I'd try and do it for her. There are some things in this story that are in honor of the late Mr. Robin Williams.  
Rated: PG-13 for language(One chapter will be M, and will be notated appropriately. Please be aware there will be some underage abuse.)

Prologue - Let me tell you a story

Loki finished the dishes in their Malibu home, glanced around the corner to see their eldest child fast asleep on the couch. Shaking his head with a light chuckle, Loki gently lifted their seven year old into his arms. "Dad?" The boy shifted in his father's arms, arms wrapping around his neck, head resting on his shoulder.

"Hush, now, little one. I'm taking you upstairs, nothing is wrong."

"Kay," his child mumbled in his ear, his breath light and warm against Loki's neck. Loki smiled warmly as he rubbed his son's back and headed up the stairs, he decided to stop and see what had come of Tony bathing and putting their younger two children to bed.

Lucas was small, much like Tony had been as a boy, but he had every bit of brilliance and mischief in him as both his fathers had together. It was sometimes amazing that Tony and Loki had ever decided to try for another child, with all the trouble Lucas had caused in his first few years of life. But it was worth it, seeing Lucas help his father with projects, watching the two work side by side. For every ounce that Howard Stark and Odin Borson were terrible and lousy fathers, Loki and Tony had worked twice as hard to ensure they were amazing fathers. Granted, they were never going to be perfect, but the two had loving relationships with their two boys and would have one with their daughter as well.

Their middle child, Maximus, or Max for short took after Tony in the looks, but he had Loki's sharp wit and pension for magic, though only three now, he'd already proven that one day he'd be quite the magician. Then there was Maggie, named Margaret for Aunt Peggy, and Peggy had chosen the nick name Maggie for the little one. She looked just like Loki, and though Loki hoped that would change one day, for now he was content to stare into her beautiful green blue eyes.

Loki pushed the door open ever so slightly, careful not to disturb the trio and peaked inside, a small erupting on his face immediately. The bedroom was dark, a small lamp in the far corner was illuminating just enough of the room to cast shadows and outlines. Anthony Stark sat in a rocking chair in the opposite corner, closer to the door, in his lap were two small children, one close to toddler age, he was sucking on his index and middle fingers and gripping his father's shirt with his other hand. The other child, an infant no more than six weeks old, lay in Anthony's other arm, she was awake, but quiet as she looked up at her father's face.

"I know what you two are thinking," Tony whispered, his head leaning back against the rocking chair. "How did a catch like your daddy Loki, get hitched to a hot mess like me," he smiled as he pressed a kiss to his toddler's head. "But truth is, your daddy and I go way back." His tiny little daughter let out a coo.

"That's right Sprout, nearly thirty years. I'll tell you the story, but you have to promise not to tell your daddy I let you stay up this late. See, it all started in 1982, when my father decided it was finally time to ship me off to boarding school…"

Chapter One – Welton Boarding School  
1982

The limo door opened, and eleven year old Anthony Stark scooted out, his black blazer crinkling slightly around the edges. He was small for his age, not that it mattered since he was rarely around anyone his age, his dark brown hair was sticking up in several directions from the nap he'd taken getting here, ruining the combed over look his nanny had given him this morning.

'Every Stark who ever amounted to anything, attended Welton Academy, let's hope it can help you," his father had intoned three hours earlier.

An older gentleman, in his early fifties based on the silver around his temples, came around to the door, and gently began to brush the creases from the blazer and gray slacks. All the while, Tony stared up at the large dormitory; he wanted to be excited about this, he really did, he was going to finally be away from Howard for most of the year. However, on the other hand, he would be the youngest in school-not that that was unusual, and he was rooming with some kid named Loki Odinson. What the hell kind of name was that.

Jarvis, the Stark family butler crouched down, drawing Tony's eyes from the dorm, "J, any chance you could stuff me in the trunk, kidnap me and claim he as your own- like I'm some product of a torrid affair?"

Jarvis chuckled, a deep low sound that helped soothe the young boy. "I'm afraid not, sir. No such act would ever be believed, after all- no child of mine could ever be such a rascal," his smile was warm though, and caused Tony to chuckle softly. Jarvis straightened Tony's tie, before he stood back up and pulled out the child's two bags and pillow. "Would you like me to accompany you upstairs, Anthony?"

"Will you visit?" Tony asked, not answering the question, his eyes imploring and desperate.

Jarvis sighed, cursing Howard and Maria Stark for having a child they never truly wanted in the first place. He crouched down again as he ran his hand through Tony's hair to straighten it, allowing his hands to caress down the boy's face to rest on his shoulders and neck. "Of course my dear boy as often as I dare. Anthony, you are a smart boy, I have no doubt you will thrive here away from the considerably stern hand of your father." He saw the collecting in the child's eyes. Tony was a kind child, sweet and had so much potential he was desperate to show the world, why couldn't his parents see it? "Now, would you like my assistance in moving in?"

Tony straightened his shoulders and shook his head as Jarvis let his hands fall away, "No, I'm good. Thanks J."

"Quite right, sir. Now, remember Mrs. Carter promised to swing by for the opening ceremony tomorrow evening, I anticipate she will wish to take you and your roommate, if you'd like, out to dinner."

"Yes sir." Tony reached out as Jarvis stood to close the back door and climb in the front of the limo. Their hands touched, and Jarvis squeezed the child's hand. "Thank you, Jarvis."

Jarvis smiled, "My pleasure, Anthony. Take care of yourself my boy."

Tony nodded and made his way across the street to the dormitory, only glancing back when he was at the door; Jarvis gave him a brief wave before the limo pulled away. Taking a slow breath, Tony began his trudge up the stairs. Four flights later, Tony brushed some of the sweat from his brow as he stepped into the hallway.

Boys littered the hallway, most at least four to five inches taller than him, a couple were tossing a football around, some others were pushing each other around playful. It was clear some of these boys had known one another for years. Taking a calming breath, Tony made his way to his room, past some of the boys who barely even looked at him.

Finally halfway down the hall he came to an open door and stepped into the entrance. A short and thin boy, probably 13 or 14 was making his bed, a woman with auburn blonde hair was busying putting several sets of clothes in one side of the closet. Both glanced up at him, and for a moment the silence was stifling.

"Well hello, you must be Anthony Stark," she greeted warmly, she had a beautiful voice, one Tony wished his mother had. It was warm, soft and inviting. However, it was also clear she could be stern and strong if demanded.

"Yes ma'am. But I prefer Tony." he replied, his voice quiet as he tried to pat down his nerves and stepped inside to dump his bags on the bed.

"Very well, my name is Frigga, and this is my son Loki." The teen didn't say anything just waved briefly before returning to his green bedding. Frigga rolled her eyes, leaving Tony to guess this wasn't the first time her son kept silent in an introduction. "I was putting some things away for Loki, helping him get settled. Did you want some assistance, or is your mother coming to help."

Tony tried to hide his blush and swallowed thickly, "My-my mother isn't coming. 'They don't care' was added in his head.

"Well then, I would be remiss if I didn't offer."

"No thank you, ma'am," He replied as he'd always been taught.

Frigga glanced at Loki who simply shrugged. She rolled her eyes once more, before walking over to him and pulling him tight hug. It looked as though both of them were struggling with this. A part of Tony felt jealous, wishing his mother and father cared about him that deeply. Pulling away, Frigga pressed a kiss to the child's forehead, "Very well then, I'll be on my way. Best behavior, Loki."

"Of course," He finally spoke; his voice was melodic, and calming.

Once she'd left, the two boys just stood there, each on the own side of their room for a long time, just looking at one another. "So, Loki, that's an interesting name."

Loki sat down on the bed he'd just made, lying back on it, "My father stems from Vikings," the Asgardian prince lied.

"Right, well…" Tony wasn't sure what else to say so he began to unpack his stuff. He'd been hanging things up in the closet when Loki spoke up again.

"How old are you?"

Tony glanced over at the boy, "Eleven."

Loki's eyes grew larger at that. "So you're a genius."

"Pretty much."

Loki grinned, "Cool," he used the human term, hoping he'd used it accurately.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two – Aunt Peggy

Loki and Tony hadn't done much in the way of bonding so far, Loki however wouldn't deny he was interested in the younger student. It was the next afternoon when they finally started talking more, while on their way to the chapel for the opening ceremony.

"My parents…couldn't come, so my Aunt Peggy is coming. She's going to take me out to dinner…did you wanna join?"

Loki glanced over at Tony and understood what the younger boy was doing, he was all alone amongst teens, he wanted a friend. Loki wanted one as well, "If it's not too much trouble, I'd love to."

"Anthony!" A woman shouted across the distance from near the chapel. Tony's head whipped around, and for the first time Loki saw Tony smile. It wasn't fake, or forced, but one of utter glee as he raced towards the woman who'd called out.

A second later Tony was lifted off the ground and whirled around like he was a small boy, clearly this was Aunt Peggy. She set him down as quick as she'd picked him up, "There's my boy," She spoke with a grin as Loki smiled and stepped over to the duo.

"Aunt Peggy, this is my roommate Loki."

She smiled and shook Loki's hand. Loki could see she was a kind woman, gentle and full of warmth as she greeted him. She reminded him of his mother. Maybe Midgard wouldn't be so bad after all. "Hello, Loki. I'm Peggy Carter. Hopefully my dear nephew isn't rubbing off on you too much. He can cause a great deal of drama when he likes.

Tony stuck his tongue out, and to Loki's surprise merely got a playful hair ruffle. Things like that were worth a slap in Asgard-at least from Odin. A prince never did such things. "No ma'am, he's a good friend," Loki lied, or at least he lied for now, he hoped they'd become friends soon enough. Loki would be here until graduation, or until Odin lifted the punishment.

"Excellent, right then, come on poppet, lets get you inside so we can get this over with," she grinned knowing her beloved Tony hated formal meetings such as this. She threw an arm around Tony's shoulder, and to his surprise, one around Loki as well. It was in that moment Loki realized why Tony adored this woman so deeply.

It was an hour and a half later they emerged, both Tony and Loki appearing bored stiff, while Peggy just shook her head, "It ceases to amaze me how one or two men can be so long winded. Well, Loki are you joining us for dinner?"

Loki smiled at Tony who nodded, "Yes ma'am!"

"Good boy, where to boys?"

"PIZZA!" Tony cheered.

Peggy laughed as she led the two boys to her car, "Tony, are we ever going to go to a dinner that isn't pizza, dear?"

Loki chuckled at that as he climbed in the back and Tony in the front seat of the small convertible. They arrived at a small Italian restaurant several minutes later and were seated quickly. Loki looked over the small menu considering what he wanted, he knew very little of the things on this list. In fact, he'd never even had pizza. "So, Loki, tell me about your self?" Peggy asked politely, she'd seated herself next to Tony.

"What would you like to know?"

She smiled warmly, "Anything dear, do you have siblings?"

"Yes ma'am, an older brother, Thor."

"Your father really does like Norse Mythology," chuckled Tony.

Peggy looked at the boy, "Don't be rude, Tony. And Loki, you needn't call me Ma'am, Peggy or Aunt Peggy is absolutely fine darling."

Loki smiled, he'd never really had an aunt before. "Yes ma'am. My older brother and I are from England, so we are each attending different schools for high school in effort to become more cultured. Or at least that's what father has said."

"Your dad sent you to a boarding school cause you misbehaved?"

Loki nodded at Tony's question. "Wow and I thought Howard was a dick."

"Anthony Stark," Peggy snapped, looking down at the boy disapprovingly. "Language, sir. He's still your father, good, bad or indifferent you are to respect him in my presence."

Tony ducked his head and nodded. Peggy shook her head and then hugged him close. "Now poppet, don't pout. Your father didn't used to be this…stern," she sighed softly. She looked over at Loki. "Howard was raised in a firm handed home anyway. Unfortunately he lost someone very dear to him a long time ago and it's made him…well you can imagine."

Loki nodded, and studied Tony for a moment, despite that he had a hunch Tony couldn't imagine. "Now, what are we ordering, Loki what do you like?"

"I've never…actually had pizza."

That snapped Tony out of his funk as his eyes grew wide. "What! Aunt Peggy, can we get two pizzas then?"

She chuckled, "Right then, we will get a pizza and you two can choose one more."

Dinner was a delightful affair in the end, Tony and Loki shared the same schedule mostly and told Peggy all about their hopes for school. Loki shared a bit more about his family, while he learned that Tony was the descendent of a wealthy weapons dealer. Loki marveled at how calm and kind Peggy was with Tony, the boy could be utterly spoiled with his childhood, much like Thor was, but instead he was a shy and relatively quiet.

Nearly two hours later, Peggy bid Loki a goodbye while he headed upstairs to the room, while Tony stayed behind in the car where she'd parked. "What's wrong poppet?"

"Aunt Peggy…can I tell you something, if you promise not to tell dad?"

She brushed the hair from his eyes, "Sweetheart, you know I'd never tell your father what you tell me in confidence. Unless it was something I thought was a danger."

"I don't want to be here," he whispered, his eyes watering. "I'm the youngest kid. And dad says it's the only way to make me worthy."

Peggy sighed and unbuckled Tony's seatbelt before pulling him into her lap like she had when he was much younger. "Anthony, I wish I could turn back time and save Steve, help your father understand the mistakes he's made with you. But your father's mistakes are not yours unless you let them become that way. You will flourish here, just give it a chance, all right?"

"Will you tell me stories about Steve?"

She smiled and hugged him close, "You would've have loved him, and him you. He was kind always stuck up for the little guy."

"Even when he was the little guy?"

She pressed a kiss to Tony's forehead, "Especially when he was the little guy." She talked for a little longer until finally giving him a squeeze, "I must go poppet, as should you. Curfew starts soon."

"Bye Aunt Peggy." She watched until he was in the dorm then drove off, cursing Howard Stark's inability to move on from simple things.

Tony made his way upstairs, "Awww, does wittwe Starkey need his mommy!" some of the older boys poked as soon as he stepped out on the floor.

Tony opened his mouth to respond, but they continued, "Must be because you're still a baby!" laughed one boy with a face full of acne.

"I bet you he still wets the bed," the laughing was all around him as his face grew red with shame and anger.

"I do not!" he growled, shoving himself into it with all his power he pushed one of the boys.

"Tony," Loki jumped in as soon as he saw what was going on from their doorway, he grabbed the younger boy.

The boys laughed behind them, "That's right, little baby needs someone to protect him from the big bad men."

Loki slammed the door behind them, locking it as if hoping that would drown their mocking comments out. Tony huffed and sat on the bed.

_"You little brat! What the hell are you evening doing in here!" Slurred Howard as he smacked his only child. "Now you're crying! Grow up Anthony, for god sakes no son of mine is a sissy. You think Captain America cried!" He growled._

"Tony?" Loki sat down beside his new found friend, watching the tear tracks form on Tony's face. How fair was it to shove a child into this atmosphere, most of these boys were twice Tony's size.

"Why did you do that?" Shouted Tony.

Loki sighed, "I'm sorry. I didn't want to see you get hurt. Are you all right?"

"I don't wet the bed."

"I didn't think or say you did." Loki was quiet for a moment, before he smiled, "Your Aunt Peggy seems very nice. I had an excellent dinner."

Tony looked over at Loki and nodded, "She's not my real aunt."

"A family friend?"

Tony nodded, scooting over, Loki joined him lying on the bed. "She's been my dad's friend for twenty years or something, anyway I guess they went through a rough time together, and she tried to stay in touch with him…I think they remind one another of better times."

Loki looked over and nodded, "I can see that. Your dad sounds…different."

The laugh was surprisingly bitter for a pre-teen, "If by different you mean inattentive, self obsessed and cruel then yes. You're right. He drinks."

"Oh…" Loki's father drank occasionally, but he'd never seen his father in any state but entirely in control. "What about your mother?"

"My mom is too busy sleeping around to notice me, not that Howard is any different. I don't even know why they had me."

Deciding this was an appropriate time to share something about himself, Loki sighed, "My father likes my brother better. The golden child," Loki murmured. "I know what it's like to not be noticed for an accomplishment. To feel passed over, like you're a piece of garbage."

"Loki can I ask a stupid question?"

"Of course."

" Would you be my friend."

Loki couldn't help but grin, "I'd be honored Anthony."

o0o

Tony's hand shot up in the air, as he was all too aware of the snickers from the back of the class. "Someone other than Tony?" The teacher asked, slightly exasperated that no one but an eleven year old could answer a question in her Chemistry class.

"What happened, Anthony, can't be teacher's pet anymore," one of the boys-Marks-sneered.

"Patrick, that's enough," The teacher growled. It didn't stop Tony from turning slightly red in embarrassment. He wasn't sure when others' opinions had started to matter, perhaps it was the awkwardness of being a preteen. Whatever it was, he was acutely aware that no one but his roommate seemed to like him, much less tolerate him.

Loki glanced over at his friend and felt for him. Granted, he was made fun of frequently as well, but somehow he managed to keep his head down mostly. He wanted to give his hand a squeeze, tell him it was okay, but he knew it wouldn't do any good right now. It wasn't the right time or place. Tony looked over at him, and Loki was mildly surprised when Tony forced out a small smile, as if nothing else mattered to him. Loki couldn't help but smile back.


End file.
